BIDEN ACCEPTANCE SPEECH

Penned by Michael Brenner

“About eighty years ago, my forebears took the liberty of conceiving a new Biden. From the very first, they were wedded to the proposition that I would turn out to be something pretty special. How right they were.

After having made it big 4 years ago, I’m now back in another contest with the same guy. It’s a test whether I, or any person so predestined to greatness, can pull off the double. We are meeting here to shape the battlefield for that great contest. A mindless media and a distracted public most probably won’t note, nor long remember, what we say here, but they surely will never forget that I managed to make it here – again.

So, as your candidate, I’m rededicating myself to the awesome but still unfinished work which, with your support, I so nobly advanced over the past four years. Let us dedicate ourselves to the great task remaining before us, that from you terrific delegates I will take increased devotion to that cause – my reelection – for which we all have given everything that we had of money, of cunning, of ambition. That we here resolve that those efforts were not a waste of time, that this party, under God, shall have a new birth of success, and that government of the people – if not always by the people or for the people – shall not perish from America.

To our friends and allies abroad, I pledge that America will do what it takes to defend our common values of freedom and democracy. We shall not stint on shedding blood, sweat and tears – even if it be mainly yours.

God bless America! God bless the rule based international order. God bless all of you – even the Palestinians.”

[Take 2: “God bless all of you – except Russia, China, Iran, North Korea, Cuba, Venezuela and the Houthis”]